Jul 30, 2013

More on Marriage.....

After Vensly coming home and the dynamics of our family changing and him being older I thought maybe I needed to start seeing a counselor to help me make sure I am doing things right and to just help me work through some things I struggle with in having five children and some personal stuff.

Yesterday hubby went with me and the counselor asked us about our marriage and we told him our whole story....struggles and all!  One thing I was proud of that he told us is that he doesn't even know what "statistic" we are or what category he would put us in.  Why you ask?  Because we got married at 19 and 21 and have had some major struggles that we made it through stronger than ever and are about to celebrate 19 years of marriage next month!  He said we should be very proud of that and WE ARE!  I am so blessed.

He did tell us some things that we should always make sure we are doing to help keep that connection.  One is a 5 second embrace.......meaning truly hug each other for at least five seconds EVERYDAY!  Not just a hug good bye or a quick kiss good bye but a real hug!  I dare you to try it!  :)

One thing that had me sad after was him telling Marc that he needs to remember that he is the ONLY man in this world that can make me feel secure.....wow that is huge for Marc.....for any husband!

What made me sad is to think how many women in this world feel insecure because their husband doesn't know that.  No one has ever told them that is their job.  He should spend everyday making her feel secure!  Has Marc always gotten this one right?  No, but he has learned with maturity and educating himself about how us women work!  

It seems that as Marc and I grow in Christ together my insecurities are fading. The more we study together what God has to say about marriage the more we do things different and the better our marriage is becoming.  Not that it has been bad, it hasn't, but it's a more Christ centered marriage now.  We are actually implementing those Biblical practices now!

I pray that God will use our marriage and what we have learned and are learning to help other young couples to protect themselves with the tools they need to have a long, happy, Christ centered marriage!

I love when he plays his guitar for us!  

Jul 26, 2013

Three Important Things I Have Learned As A Wife......

When I married I was really young.....to young if you were to ask me now!  BUT....we are about to celebrate our 19th wedding anniversary!
We were 19 and 21......

Of course I have learned some really big lessons but I wanted to just share a few small things that can be big to our hubbies!
One my hubby just revealed to me a few weeks ago.......(these are mainly for stay-at-home moms because that is what I have been my whole married life so I don't know any different.  I actually don't know how my working mom did it all those years!)

1.  Dinner AT HOME!  I am embarrassed to say that it took me this long to learn how extremely important this is to my husband.  He has said things on and off through our whole marriage about it but never really complained about my non-cooking!  He finally told me that when I cook a homemade meal that to him that shows him I love him and care about what he wants!  WOW!

Tip-  My best friend and I told a whole day and made freezer meals.  I ended up with 8 freezer meals that day and that was the easiest 8 days of cooking I have ever had!  Actually I don't think I have ever cooked 8 days in a row.  He was so happy and we had lots of family time!  I don't think we have had fast food or otherwise in about three weeks.  Saving money and so much better for us!

2. Make your house a home.  Keep it clean!  I have always enjoyed decorating and redecorating my house so making it a home has come easy to me and I know my husband loves that about me.  He always loves our house and anything I do.  We have been lucky that we always have the same taste and ideas about our home.

Tip- KEEP IT CLEAN!  I don't always get this one totally right but I try!  Early in my marriage my house was a wreck most of the time out of just being immature but today I try to make sure my hubby comes home to a clean living room and bedroom.  I don't think it's fair for him to work all day and come home to a mess!  I understand with kids this is not always possible but try.....at least TRY to make him have a nice space to come home and relax in!  Light candles......use plug-ins or better yet the smell of dinner in the crock pot is good too!

This is his view every night!

3. PRAY FOR HIM!  Pray for your hubby EVERYDAY!  There are so many things that our husband have to face and things that they may not pray for themselves so it's up to us to pray it for them!  Here are just a few of them......
his job
his finances
his choices
his protection
his health
his temptations
his purpose
his fears
his mind........this list can go on and on!  Just pick the ones that each day you think he needs!  
The Power of the Praying Wife is a good book to help you with that!  It's by Stormie Omartian.

4.  PRAY TOGETHER!  We have just recently started this and while I still feel nervous at times it has changed my marriage.  I can't even explain it right now but it's amazing the feeling I have when we are praying together.  What an answered prayer for me!  God is good and His timing is perfect!  
If you and your husband don't do this just pray that God will bring you together in this way and in time He will.  I prayed about this in my own marriage for years.  Even though Marc was a very Godly man it just wasn't our thing.....now it is though!!!!  I love it!

I really think I love this man more today than I did the day I married him!

Try these things.....at least the first three and pray about the fourth and I promise you won't regret it!  Your marriage will be better for it!

Jul 12, 2013

Five on Friday.......

I have had some serious writer's block lately so today I saw an idea to write about FIVE things I have going on right now or five things I am loving.......

The biggest thing going on in my life right now is P90X.....yes, that's right I am officially on day 13 today!  Tomorrow marks 2 WEEKS since I started.  I am so excited to finish the 90 days and hopefully be a NEW ME!
I started a blog about my days....what I have learned or what I am learning!  It's not easy but I am so proud I have stuck it out this long and I will be darn if I am quitting now!

I am hoping to rock this number next summer for my 20th wedding anniversary!!!
(and to have that body! )

That brings me to the second thing......eating clean!  I have tried so hard to do this and it is not easy!  I have bought almost everything organic and some vegan stuff but my kids are fighting it every step of the way!  That's ok.....p90x has made me so much stronger......I can take them!!!!!  Ok, I have to admit that the veggie dogs were gross!!!!  LOL!

The third thing I am loving is my 6 A.M. appointment each morning with my hubby to read our Bibles together!  I love to see how God speaks to us during that time with whatever we choose to read!
I really feel like we have grown so much closer because of this.  Am I still a little embarrassed to pray in front of my hubby of almost 20 years?  Yes, but it's getting easier!

The fourth thing is this new app for pictures!  I LOVE IT!  It's called Rhonna Designs and I know it's available for IPhone!

Five is being with my kids this summer and swimming late into the night!  I told hubby last night that putting in our pool was the best thing we every did!  My kids definitely get our moneys worth out of it!  I love sitting outside in the evening rocking in my rocking chair and watching them swim!  Memories are being made for sure!!!!!
Also, Mamaw's new waterside.....my kids love it and can't wait to go back to play on it!